The Marriage of Your Dreams
The night before a weekend away with my husband Troy, I set my alarm for 4:10am. Moments later, Troy mentions to me, “I’ve set my alarm for 5:10am in the morning.” He’s got to be kidding! Right? The plane leaves at 6:20am; we need to be at the airport by at least 5:00am. You know, in case there is traffic on the road, or a change to the boarding gate, or if I slip on a banana peel! OK, maybe I’m a little over the top when it comes to my on-time-anxiety. But as they say, better to be safe than sorry. I agreed that 4:10am was a little early, so I changed my alarm to be a little later. But, lo and behold, I naturally woke up at that time and we were in the car by 4:30am the next morning. Troy knew I wouldn’t relax until I was at our gate with plenty of time to spare (thanks, Troy!)
When it comes to marriage, there are often areas where we differ from our spouse. This is why we’ve all heard the saying ‘opposites attract’. Of course, this isn’t the case for relationships as a whole. I dare say that it’s usually common interests that draw most couples together. For Troy and I, our love for the beach is actually how we met and is still one of our favourite places to spend time together (now with our children).
I remember our pre-marriage counsellor telling us how important it was in marriage to make it a priority to enjoy one another’s company. At the time he said something like: “As you grow older, and God willing have children, and you become busier, to make time together a priority will be difficult. But it’s so important!” I’ve recognised the truth of this more and more the longer we’ve been married. We gleaned a lot of other wisdom from him including the importance of praying together and avoiding language like “always” or “never” when we’re arguing (it’s generally far from the truth that one always or never does or doesn’t do something). We were young when we were married and the financial cost for the pre-marriage counsellor was significant at the time, but we decided that it was more than a financial cost; it was an investment into our future.
If you care for something it’s easy to spend time and money on it. I care about being able to easily drive every day, so I invest in regular car servicing. My son cares about improving his skills on the drums and piano, so he invests time in practising regularly. My husband cares about his turf (something I’ll never really understand), so he takes time to mow regularly, to fertilise and to remove weeds.
What about our marriages? Are we taking time to care for them? Do we take time to enjoy one another’s company? Are we investing time together away from technology and work and busyness to properly pay attention to one another?
Coming up in July here at Oasis Church we will be hosting a marriage conference called ‘The Marriage of Your Dreams’ with Dr. Paul David Tripp. It will be held on Saturday the 23rd of July from 8:30am to 2:30pm. It’s only $10 per person and child care will be provided for children up to 12 years old. Please take the time to invest into one of the most important things in our life, our marriages. You can register here
You can watch an extract of the teaching here.
‘Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God – this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – his good, pleasing and perfect will.’ (Romans 12:1-2)